Sunday, 31 July 2016

Can be worse.

Life, can be worse.


Being a 24 year old medical student was fine, but I was HIV positive. I was recently diagnosed of virus and it came as a shock to both me and my family. My parents told me not to worry about it and continue leading a life as normal as I could. And I tried.
I stopped going to college but the university let me write the exams and I got my bachelor degree. I couldn’t continue in the medical field after that. I had to quit.
Yes, my parents always supported me but I wanted to find someone whom I could love and feel and touch without them being scared. I wanted a companion, a lover.
So I decided the best partner I could find was someone who was HIV positive as well. I organized a talk, a seminar about how I was dealing with the difficulties and living with the deadly disease. But this lecture was open to only the HIV positive people, and I kept an age limit till 35. Both boys and girls were allowed.
I never had a problem with the boys, in fact I was very quick to realize that I liked boys as well, I like the boys more than the girls. Before HIV I didn’t show any of this to anyone, I controlled my feelings but now, after HIV, I was free. I could like whomever I wanted, be the real me. My parents never objected me or questioned me. That was one of the perks of HIV. And that’s when I also realized being gay, or bisexual, or any sexual preference which was seen as a taboo by the community wasn’t as bad as dying.
The seminar didn’t attract a lot of people; the hall was small but still empty. Only about ten came for the seminar and I was happy about it.
My intention was to find anyone in that room who would be with me. There was only one single female in the crowd. And she was kind of familiar, then I remembered, she was my college mate and we were good friends back in college.
She could have been a good choice but then she was a good friend and I didn’t want our relationship to spoil. And I wasn’t interested in girls anyway.
We had a friendly conversation and it was nice to meet her again. She told me that she contracted the virus after some accidental blood transfusion form an infected person.
The seminar went on and there was one more boy in the room who I was attracted to. He looked my age and was cute.
But Swati, my friend also asked me whether we could support each other and have a relationship. I sadly rejected her offer by saying that I was more interested in men than women. She understood my feeling and happily accepted my reason. I felt sad and hoped that she found someone.
I approached the boy and it turned out that he was gay too. I had got a companion; the seminar was a success.
After the seminar, I was standing at the door, waiting as people left the room.
 Swati came to me before leaving, she wanted to say goodbye, maybe this was the last time we were going to see each other.
“You know……” she said as she shook my hands. My boyfriend was standing beside me, holding my arms.
“Your life isn’t as bad as you thing, you have your parents to support you and now you have found a companion. That is all you need. Love and companionship is all you need and you have it. Enjoy your life.”
“Yes, thank you. I hope you find someone too” I said.
 After all of them left I saw the pile of sheets of the participants. I had asked them to get proof of their test reports, just to be sure. But I never checked them.
Out of curiosity I went through reports, just flicked the sheets. All HIV positive in the bottom of the paper, except I noticed something different in one of the papers.
This made me search thoroughly again. I went through each sheet and the second last sheet. It was there.
Swati was HIV Negative.
I remembered what she told me last before leaving. And it taught me a very important lesson in life.
 Being HIV positive isn’t the worst thing that can happen to a person. Not having a family is.




Friday, 29 July 2016

The hard life.

The hard life.


He was late to his clinic by an hour, his patients had been waiting since more than an hour. He walked passed them to his room and started his daily practice.
It was a routine for him. One of his patient was an old woman in her sixties, she was accompanied by his son who come with complaints of fever. Most of the cases were typical fever or headache cases. The son was clearly not happy about the doctor’s behavior but didn’t say anything.
The doctor went on to examine the patient. The son was a laborer and had skipped his entire days’ work to meet the doctor.
The doctor finished the examination in just a few seconds and gave her a tablet for fever and pain “The fever will subside in a couple of days”
The son and his mother went away. They were charged 500 rupees for consultation. The son couldn’t believe it, the doctor had just prescribed a tablet and did nothing. It was not worth the cost. But he had to pay and he did. He would have a tough time managing this month’s expenditure.
2 days later, again the son came again with her mother. This time no fever but some joint pain. The pain was common for her age. There was no problem but he couldn't send her away without giving her a tablet. He knew that the son was not educated enough to understand it. So he examined her again a little and gave her the tablet.
“The pain will go away in a few days” he sent her away.
This time the son said he couldn’t afford to pay so much money.
So the doctor charged only 300 bucks this time. The amount was less but still a lot for the son. He payed considering that the doctor had reduced the amount. He hoped that his mother was cure completely.
After a few days again he came back.
His mother had headache this time.
The doctor knew this was a typical patient, came for all the silly reasons. Actually the mother didn’t have any major illness, just some minor problems. She referred everything as pain and headache.
The doctor examined and again gave her the same tablet.
“She will be fine in a few days”
The son again complained about the money.
The amount was reduced to 250. The son couldn’t control his anger any longer.
He went inside the doctor’s room and started slapping the doctor in full force. He tore the doctor’s shirt and bashed him to his head and face with his fists. Once the doctor was on the floor he even kicked him a few times.
“Enough is enough. You think you can fool me. Just charging money for doing nothing. You are a fraud, stealing money from poor people and enjoying your life. Your medicines are not working. You are giving my mother new diseases every time and want to make money. You all should be put to jail and thrashed.” He said and walked out of the room.
The doctor was hurt and on the floor. More than hurt, for the first time in his life he was afraid, he was shocked. He was just doing his duty; he didn't do anything wrong but still was punished. He never thought that he would be attacked by someone who he was helping.
The doctor closed his clinic for the day. He had lost hope on this profession for which he had dedicated 30 years of his life, the profession which he loved so much. But today, he was sad. The profession didn’t give him back. All those years and sacrifice, he felt wasn’t worth it. Maybe he could have been an artist, a writer, a singer, an actor but he had sacrificed it and his life a long time ago.
It was getting dark and the doctor slowly walked to his small house.
The doctor never enjoyed his job again, and always feared his next patient.

 The relationship between the doctor and patient is getting worse every day.
Doctors sacrifice their lives for the betterment of the people, and they have the right to charge an amount for their services.
They are your only chance of living. So treat them nicely. They know what they are doing. We need to trust them.


Monday, 25 July 2016

The last workout

The Late night workout.


He was the only one remaining at the gym. It was midnight and he was pumping his biceps. This was his last set of the day before he would lock down the gym and leave.
As he was doing his final sets, he suddenly noticed someone at the other corner of the gym. There was someone, but he had made sure everyone left. He saw properly, no one was there,
He again continued pumping when suddenly the lights started flickering at the opposite end and one of the weights fell down by itself. He immediately threw down the dumbbells to the ground, he was scared.
The lights flickered and he noticed a shadow working out. He couldn’t believe it, maybe it was some intruder. The shadow, was that off a bodybuilder who was doing heavy deadlifts. The rod was chained around his hands and he let it down with a scream. He wasn’t visible clearly but he had very pale skin from the back and his veins were bulging out from everywhere.
He wanted to run out of the gym but something kept him back, he was too curious to find out who this man was.
He slowly walked to him. He was shaking as he walked. The lights over the shadow was still flickering and as he approached the shadow the lights started flickering everywhere else.
The lights went on and off, the treadmills were running again. The weights started falling all over the place randomly and violently.
He was too scared, there was a dumbbell nearby, so the man got hold one of it firmly in his hand. He approached the shadow from behind. But then the shadow was gone, it had disappeared.
The lights came back to normal, the treadmills had stopped. Maybe he was too stressed out that he was imagining all of this.
He was relieved, and sat on one of the chairs. As he was wiping his face, he felt a presence behind him. His eyes widened, he slowly turned back………and then nothing.
He again let out a sigh of relief. And went back to wiping his face on the mirror.
When he just finished wiping his face and removed the cloth from his face, it was right above him, crouching on the rod over his head.

It white eyes were wide open and its face pale white, veins were popping out from bald forehead. It pounced on the man.

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